2006-2007 in review

Hi, family, friends, acquaintances, and whoever else happens to be reading this,

You’re right. I didn’t send holiday messages last year, nor did I post a review of 2006. Consequently, I’m making up for that this year. No, I don’t mean you’ll be receiving 2 holiday messages this time. I mean I’ll be covering both 2006 and 2007 in this summary.

I’m having difficulty grokking that it’s been a year since last Christmas (etc.), let alone that it’s been 2 years since I wrote one of these. Life seems to go a lot faster now than it did when I was a young one.

But, it’s true. 2006 and 2007 have come and mostly gone. I’m going to give you a short story and another one nearly the size of a Harry Potter novel. That way you can either just capture the highlights or else go more deeply into my life story for 2006 and 2007.

As always, I’d like to hear about you, too. What’s up with you? What has changed? What are your challenges? What opportunities are alive in your life? What has touched you? Surely your story is at least as interesting as mine is.

Now, for those of you who don’t want to read

the long version, here’s the brief accounting

of the past 2 years in the life of Michael:

Trigeminal Neuralgia pain; life compromised.

No romantic relationship or dating.

Worked in several films and TV programs; watch for me in Comanche Moon (any time they’re in Austin) beginning on CBS-TV on January 13^th.

Temp jobs for money.

Sharing a home with Kim and Chris.

Friends distant and online.

Not much outside of home for fun.

And now, here’s the more extensive version of the story. I’ve created headings in case you’re only interested in parts of my life.

HEALTH:

It’s been over 3 years since I began having symptoms of Trigeminal Neuralgia. I have 2 or 3 months of total remission from the pain every once in a while, but otherwise I have episodes of mild to extremely severe pain (like electric shocks in my face) anywhere from every few hours to every 5 minutes at its worst. If you want to know more about TN, see http://www.tna-support.org. Most people have never even heard of it.

The docs have prescribed lots of different meds, and some of them help a little, but none of them helps a lot. Even most narcotics (the prescribed ones, of course) haven’t helped much. Now I won’t even bother with them.

Depending on how severe the pain is, it interferes with nearly everything in my life from talking to eating to working to sleeping to …

ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS AND DATING:

Zero. Zilch. Nada. Niente. Nothing. Is that clear?

It has now been over 2 years since Antoinette and I broke up, so that isn’t what’s stopping me. Partly I can’t imagine anyone wanting to get involved with me being in pain so much of the time.

The other part of the problem is that I’m repeatedly attracted to inappropriate women – too young, too far away, too involved, too different than me, too whatever. My latest crush (and by crush, I mean an unreasonable attraction to an unavailable woman) is to Tal Wilkenfeld, a 21-year old bass-player I saw on TV playing with Jeff Beck. (Did anyone else watch the concert on PBS that’s a tribute to Eric Clapton? That’s where I saw her.) Get what I mean by inappropriate?

FILMS AND TV I WORKED IN:

In the past 2 years I’ve worked in Comanche Moon (CBS-TV miniseries), Save Me (movie), The Lost Room (Sci-Fi Channel miniseries, now on DVD – one of my favorite sci-fi movies of all time), Wildfire (one episode of an ABC Family Channel series), Naked Prey (movie), 10/11 (a very low budget film), and Shoot First and Pray You Live (movie).

Bordertown, a movie I worked in during 2005, still hasn’t been released, either theatrically or on DVD. That’s the one in which I worked with Jennifer Lopez and Martin Sheen.

I’ll say a little more about Comanche Moon since it’s on CBS-TV on January 13^th, 15^th, and 16^th (Sunday, Tuesday, and Wednesday). I worked in it about 6 weeks as an Austin townsperson. I could possibly show up onscreen any time they’re in Austin. Here are some scenes you might particularly see me in: I’m the man in the stage coach when Clara gets in to leave Austin; I’m the only person in the background (looking at boots and then turning and walking away) when Clara and Maggie are talking in the general store (Simon, the director, framed it so I could be seen, so that’s me); I’m walking down the sidewalk with a woman as Gus comes storming down the opposite direction, and she and I stop and turn to look at him as he passes us. There are a lot of other scenes I was in, but I have no idea which ones I’ll actually be seen in. Based on past experience, I’m rarely in productions as much as I could have been, and some scenes I was in have been cut out entirely. We shall see. CBS has posted a website about Comanche Moon if you’d like to see some photos (http://www.cbs.com/specials/comanche_moon/index.shtml).

If you want to know more about my acting career, I suggest that you read my acting blog (http://mjgsf.blogspot.com). I’ll write more about all the productions I’ve been in soon. I’ll start with Comanche Moon since it’s coming up so soon.

I’m not as fascinated with being a background actor as I used to be. I’m ready to be a “foreground” actor with speaking roles. I’ll let you know when that happens.

Last winter a friend and I began a cooperative acting group for actors who are serious about our careers. It foundered, though, for a variety of reasons, a big one of which was that I began having a serious flare up of TN and stopped putting the energy into getting it going well. I want to get it going again.

Do you know that they’ve built and are planning several full-blown movie studios in the Albuquerque area? We have a lot of productions going on here and will have more when we have more studios.

I am, by the way, also working on writing a couple of screenplays.

OTHER JOBS:

Between wanting to be available for movie and TV roles and being in pain from TN, I’ve had difficulty with jobs.

I haven’t been able to schedule classes and workshops to facilitate, coaching, or ministry services because I never know when I’ll be able to do them. I’m thinking about options.

You may remember that I was substitute teaching in high school (and occasionally in middle school). I was also considering taking the teacher training program that’s available here at the community college so I could be a full-time high school teacher. But, as I said in my review of 2005, the TN pain compromised my ability to teach. I also missed a couple of film roles because I was scheduled to teach at that time. And, believe it or not, I made a little less money per day substitute teaching than I do working at temporary jobs. I make a lot less per day than I do working in films or TV.

So, I’ve ended up relying on temporary jobs to survive, at least until I get speaking roles in films or TV. I’m in a long-term temp job now doing data entry and information processing. I can stop working briefly whenever the pain is too severe (it only lasts for a minute or 2 at a time), and I can take time off for good film or TV roles. It’s to me what waiting is to a lot of actors.

SPIRITUAL LIFE:

I’ve moved into another private phase of my spiritual life. In other words, I haven’t been attending church or participating in meetings or taking classes much. I just haven’t felt like I belonged in those places much in the past couple of years. Of course, when I’m having TN flare-ups, I don’t feel like I belong much of any place.

I did participate in a discussion group about Eckhart Tolle’s The New Earth and facilitate another discussion group about Esther and Jerry Hicks’ The Law of Attraction. I was going to continue a couple of groups, and I never did. Or, at least, I haven’t so far.

HOME:

Last time I wrote that I was sharing an apartment. I moved out of that at the end of May, 2006, because he and his partner decided to live together. I moved into a temporary place for the summer. In September I moved into Kim’s house to share with her and her adult son, Chris. She is a costumer for theater and films. That means she designs and builds costumes. We have similar senses of humor and many similar interests, and it’s working well.

FRIENDS:

Who are my friends? I wrote a blog entry about that.

I miss having really close friends who are nearby. My closest friends are still states away or online. I had some close friends here in Santa Fe who I’ve let drift away for one reason or another. I don’t want to reveal the reasons. It’s up to me to develop the kinds of friends I want. And I need to keep in touch with my friends a lot better than I do. And I have a lot of things to clean up or complete with a lot of people.

Here are a few (what I think are) interesting comments about people I know. I’m not going to use names because none of these people have given me permission to do so.

One friend survived a bout with cancer. Another one (one of my film friends – those people who

I met while making movies or TV programs) just had surgery for skin cancer. A 3^rd friend had cancer, and I haven’t heard how that’s going. Anyone who wants to send out some prayers or healing energy, I encourage that. If you want to know names, let me know and I’ll ask them if it’s OK.

One of my former mothers-in-law died in September. I only found out by doing a search on the internet about her daughter. I’m sorry that I wasn’t able to send sympathy cards to her family earlier.

Several of my friends are having job issues. Prayers and healing energy are invited for them, too.

I’ve gotten to know a woman from France via the internet and e-mail. We have a lot in common despite our different cultures. When I visited the French Riviera a number of years ago, we discovered, we could possibly have seen each other. She visited with her parents that summer. I’ve learned a lot about France from her.

I’ve also gotten to know quite a few Aussies and Canadians online.

I met one of my film friends at a fitting for costumes for a film we were going to be in together. We got to know each other better while on set. In talking with her, I discovered that I had seen her in a previous film we had both been in together, though we were never in the same scenes. In the film she was nude. I really respected her willingness to do what it took for the role. And it was kind of a rush to realize that I had seen her nude before I ever talked with her.

While searching online for addresses to send holiday greetings, I found a site with a lot of photos of a couple who were friends of mine and my former wife’s at KU. They were at different ages and also showed their kids. I love the internet.

I got a brief message from someone I had been very close with at one time. She said she’s engaged to be married. I have to find out more.

I’m disappointed to learn that some people I knew more or fewer years ago who I’ve written to don’t remember me, or only remember me vaguely. I guess I wasn’t really important to them. At least one of them is a woman I dated for a number of months. I guess I wasn’t really important to them. On the other hand, I’m pleased when people do remember me and are happy that I’ve contacted them.

I’d bet that there are at least a few of you who are trying to figure out who I’m talking about (or who think you already know in some cases).

COMMUNITY:

I’ve been thinking about intentional community again. I don’t mean a back to the land, living off the grid sort of intentional community. I mean a spiritual community in Santa Fe, perhaps a community of people who don’t live together but who still share a lot. I was really serious about it before I moved to Santa Fe, but I’m just thinking casually at this point. It would be nice to have a pseudofamily.

RECREATION:

Not a whole lot outside of the house. Between being in pain and not dating anyone, I haven’t had much motivation to go out much. Thus no reports about all the kinds of fascinating things I used to do with Antoinette. I guess I need to start dating so I don’t vegetate. Of course, finding someone to date would be quite a bit easier if I were out doing things.

Movies: The only 3 movies I’ve seen in the past couple of years that I remember, that I hadn’t seen before, and that I liked a lot were The Secret, Elizabethtown, and Pan’s Labyrinth. I saw all of them on DVD. Maybe I should write down the titles of movies I like from now on.

TV: If you’re anything like me, you might enjoy at least some of my favorite TV programs. The ones I remember at the moment are Grey’s Anatomy (does anyone else think the spin-off, Private Practice, is a disappointment and wish Addison would come back to Seattle Grace?), Ghost Whisperer (I love the premise, and I love Love – Jennifer Love Hewitt), Brothers and Sisters (are they sure they aren’t an Italian family?), Samantha Who? (one of the few comedies I actually laugh about), Ugly Betty (can you help cheering for Betty?), Desperate Housewives (another of my crushes, Dana Delany, joined the cast this season, which upgrades my interest significantly), and, amazingly enough, Dancing with the Stars (who knew? Now I want to learn some of the dances). I’m giving October Road a chance, but it seems like a two-trick pony so far (is the boy his and will he get back together with his former g/f?). I’ve only seen The Big Bang Theory twice, but I laughed a lot. It may become a favorite. (I admit that I identify with the guys, except that they’re both nerdier and more exceptionally intelligent than I am. Sara Gilbert plays hilariously deadpan in it.) Men in Trees was promising (sort of a remake of Northern Exposure, it seemed to me), but then they put it opposite Ghost Whisperer, and I stopped watching. I don’t know if they’ll ever do another one, but I also really enjoyed the reality show Kid Nation. It was filmed at a movie set outside of Santa Fe that I’ve worked on, too. It’s the kind of experience I wish I had had the courage and the opportunity to participate in when I was a kid. If I had kids, I’d send one to the next version.

Sports, watching (and reading about): I follow the football and basketball seasons of UNM (in Albuquerque, so I hear about them on the TV news; as I post this the New Mexico Bowl is about to begin, and I’m eager to see if UNM can finally win a bowl game), KU (my alma mater – good seasons in both sports this year; looking forward to the Orange Bowl game), and not so much UW any more since I’ve been away from Seattle for 6 years. I also follow the Seattle Mariners and the Seattle Seahawks pro teams. I’ve mostly lost interest in the Seattle Supersonics since they’re losing so many of their games.

Sports, playing: I keep hoping for the opportunity to play on a league softball team again, and so far all I’ve done is hope. How could I play while I’m flaring with TN? I haven’t even discovered yet where there are adult softball leagues here in Santa Fe. If I knew, I might put together a team. Come to think of it, I do know who to ask. Of course, if I played in a coed league, it would serve another purpose, too

Hiking: I recently joined a hiking group. There are lots of great places to hike in northern New Mexico, and a group is a way to meet people. With any luck, some of them will be interesting single women. However, this isn’t my time of year for hiking. I’ll be more motivated when it gets warmer.

MEMORIES:

Does it ever happen with you that sometimes something triggers a memory from long ago, and then you spend time imagining how you would do things differently if you had the opportunity again, knowing what you know now? Or else you look at it with a more mature understanding? Or else you wish you could talk with those people now for some reason or another? I do that a lot.

Are you wondering? Yes, something I wrote set off a memory.

SOCIOPOLITICAL WORLD:

I’m pretty much the same Michael I’ve been with the same kinds of opinions I’ve had since I was in my late teens, at least in terms of the sociopolitical world. Here are a few of those opinions that are relevant to these times:

Bring the troops home now. All of them. Our military presence in Iraq is doing nothing more than creating more and more enemies and killing and maiming more and more people, both our own and Iraqis.

For President and Vice President: Bill Richardson and Dennis Kucinich on a ticket together.

Eliminate all victimless crimes. In other words, if it doesn’t harm people who aren’t choosing to participate, make it legal.

Get everyone out of prison who isn’t a threat to harm people. Find other consequences for nonviolent offenses. I have some ideas if anyone is interested.

And relevant to more than a few people I know (possibly including myself), legalize medical marijuana. Do you realize that nearly all other drugs are legal for medical purposes, even the opiates?

I wonder how many of y’all have upset yourself about one or more of these opinions.

OTHER HIGHLIGHTS:

There’s more?

IN CONCLUSION:

I wonder what’s happened to me since I wrote funny holiday letters.

As I say every year, I invite you to join with me in holding the faith that life is wonderful, no matter how it may be appearing in any given moment, that everything is unfolding for the highest benefit of all beings, and that the only thing that keeps us from experiencing all of God’s abundance is our own consciousness. May we all eagerly step through whatever doorways appear in our paths, knowing that what will appear on the other side will be magnificence.

Here comes 2008. Please join with me in bringing love, peace, kindness, compassion, health, happiness, prosperity, abundant blessings, and amazing advances in awakening and growth to our planet.

In holiday spirits,

Michael

ohanamd@earthlink.net

This Is My Life (my personal blog):

Blogger http://ohanamd.blogspot.com

My Life in Acting (my acting blog):

Blogger http://mjgsf.blogspot.com

Networking sites:

Care2 http://my.care2.com/ohanamd2 and http://my.care2.com/mjgsf

Powerful Intentions http://ohanamd.powerfulintentions.com and http://mjgsf.powerfulintentions.com

My Space http://www.myspace.com/ohanamd and http://www.myspace.com/mjgsf

Zaadz http://ohanamd.zaadz.com and http://mjgsf.zaadz.com